1) To have to check that your dog is breathing.
I've done it for a long time, way before he had his funny turns, as he does a very good impression of a dead dog. If he's not snoring I watch his stomach to see that it's rising and falling. Then he lifts his head and looks at me. I don't want to worry him so I so say, 'Hi, Harvs, all right?'
He rolls his eyes and goes back to sleep: he is used to me and my little ways.
2) To expose yourself on national television.
Last night, because I was feeling sorry for myself, I curled up on the sofa with a blanket and watched Ten Years Younger, Bikini Special. Ohmigosh.
If you didn't watch it - how wise of you - it was about a woman of 42 who had lost 5 stone and was covered in droopy skin and bits. They asked 100 people how old she looked and they said, duh dooh (the noise from Family Fortunes).
I thought Trinny and Suzannah's programme was blunt enough but this was no holds barred. The consultant had great fun with his felt pen, and that was before he started with his knife. Uuurrrggghh.
2 comments:
I watched it last week and the caps they put on this woman's teeth made her look like Janet Street Porter!
Still, the recipient seemed pleased, and they did do a good job on her.
:o)
I always check on Holly. But she is quicker to wake up and then she tries to climb on me etc.
She has guinea-pig dreams too.
Did I tell you that Steve saw a guinea pig run across the path when we were walking Holly near Otterton on the weekend? He shouted "Look! A guinea pig!" and ran to the spot where it had vanished.
He peered into the long grass and said it was definitely a guinea pig.
I suggested maybe it was a water vole from the river we were walking along. I am not sure how many domestic guinea pigs live in the wild. But who knows.
There are a lot of imaginary guinea pigs in this house.
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