Tuesday, February 14, 2006

In which Harvey and I share sad stories

It is taking longer and longer to cover shorter distances on our walks. Harvey can't even stand on three legs to pee now. He has to wee like a girl. What's that, Harvs? ... Sorry, Harvey would like to make it clear that he COULD stand on three legs to pee if he wanted to but he chooses not to. He has always felt that it is a silly custom and now he is mature enough to cock a snoot at the world and do it his way. So there.

It's all right, Harvey, I will tell you a sad story to cheer you up. ... You don't want cheering up? Well, I do. So I will tell it anyway.

It is Valentine's Day today. This morning Alun popped into the office and said, 'I am taking the day off to spend it with my lovely wife.'
Taking the day off to spend it with his wife! I felt, well, betrayed isn't too strong a word. All year long I have to share an office with him and on the one day when I might have expected a little appreciation, he disappears to spend it with his wife. Men are so feckless. 'I'm not sending you a Valentine's card next year.'
'Did you send me one this year?'
'No, but that's not the point.'

I never liked Valentine's Day until I was in my twenties because I never got a card. Except from my mum. And once, in junior school, from the wimpiest boy in the class who used to wet himself. I think he came out at university.

So you see, Harvey, it's ... zzzzzzzzzzzz ...et tu, Harvey?

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